What to Do When Your Kids Have Caught You in the Act


We thought the door was locked.

We thought the kids (ages 5 and 1) were asleep.

We were wrong.

I honestly can’t tell you the moment we finally figured out that our two little sweet souls were observing us, but I can share with you the moment I glimpsed at my pajama-clad children standing at the foot of my bed with quizzical expressions.

I died a thousand mommy deaths… frantically trying to figure out how much our children observed.  Yes, this cringe-inducing scenario is regrettable. But it may not be as bad as you think.

After several minutes locking myself in the bathroom and analyzing the information provided to me from googling, “How to talk to your young kids who caught you having sex,” this is how I handled one of the most mortifying experiences in my life.
• DO invest in a lock for the bedroom door. (Or in our case, actually USE the lock!)
• DON’T feel overly guilty — your child may sense your embarrassment and conclude that sex is shameful.
• DO take a moment to collect your thoughts.
• DON’T fumble through a full-on explanation immediately.
• DO use simple, age-appropriate language. I explained to our then 5 year old, “Mommy and Daddy were hugging, because we love each other”
• DON’T over explain or give too many details, especially if the child is younger than 5.
• DO discuss the matter factually and comfortably with children 5 and older.
• DON’T avoid the topic or wait for children to bring it up.
• DO let the child know he or she did nothing wrong by walking in.